Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Reminds me of the time I whipped my nipples out.

I do not dream very often.

The other night, I had a nightmare.

A freaking nightmare that sent me into a panic.

I was dreaming that I was asleep in my bed.

We have a big (king size), comfy (1000 thread count sheets), soft (memory foam), bed. I love it.

Anyway, I dreamed that Ryan got in bed with his shoes on!

I flipped. I mean I was kicking and screaming. I was extremely angry.

I can't stand for my sheets to feel dirty. I don't even like for the sheets to be wrinkled. I am that freak that will actually make her bed before she gets in it. My house might be a disaster but rarely do I leave the bed unmade.


So, I dream he is in my bed with his shoes on. I'm talking muddy, nasty shoes.

I try to push him off the bed.

No, really. I was REALLY pushing him off of the bed.

I woke up in a sweat, still pushing him. He was yelling, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?"

I've never done anything crazy like that in my sleep. It was kind of embarrassing.

Last time I did something crazy like that, I was all jacked up on magnesium sulfate and I literally whipped my boobs out and made my friend watch my breast pump suck my nipples in and out. I was mortified when she told me.

Please tell me you have done something crazy embarrassing.


Midwest Mommy said...

OMG This is great! I sleep walk a lot but never whipped my nipples out, lol.

Patrice said...

That is hilarious!! You are so funny, I can't get over it!!!

Amy said...

too funny!

Krystyn said...

Nope...not once..not ever. I never do anything embarrassing (full of seething sarcasm).

In fact, I usually blog about said events.

Ellen said...

I don't have sleep issues but my husband does. Some of his incidents are much worse than yours. I'll tell you about them sometime when we're not on a public forum!