Friday, December 24, 2010

Fa La La La La, La La La La

Christmas Survey...

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags? Wrapping paper with big pretty bows

2. Real tree or Artificial? Real. Note to self... do not place Christmas tree directly under heat vent next year.

3. When do you put up tree? Usually the weekend after Thanksgiving. We were a little late this year.

4. When do you take the tree down? Ryan requests it be down the day after Christmas.

5. Do you like eggnog? Ummm... no. I think I've tried it once when I was young and it was terrible. I do like Gl├╝hwein. It is a warm spiced red wine. My inlaws brought some home from Germany a few years ago. It is to die for.

6. Favorite gift received as a child? Golf cart

7. Hardest person to buy for? Ryan

8. Easiest person to buy for? Caroline and Bug

9. Do you have a nativity scene? Yes. Two. Jesus is the reason for the season, duh!

10. Mail or email Christmas cards? This year... neither.

11. Worst Christmas gift you ever received? No gift is a bad gift.

12. Favorite Christmas Movie? Elf

13. When do you start shopping for Christmas? No date. We are still shopping on Christmas Eve most years.

14. Have you ever recycled a Christmas present? I plead the 5th.

15. Favorite thing to eat at Christmas? Sausage balls, dressing... actually EVERYTHING.

16. Lights on the tree? Yep. I am a freak when it comes to lights. Caroline and Emma's small white tree (it's about 6 feet) has 800. My real tree in the den is about 7 feet and has 1200.

17. Favorite Christmas song?

18. Travel at Christmas or stay home? We stay in town. We (meaning all 15 of us.. my mom's family) spend the night together on Christmas Eve.

19. Can you name all of Santa's reindeer? Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, Rudolph

20. Angel on the tree top or a star? Silver glittery star

21. Open the presents Christmas Eve or morning? Morning

22. Most annoying thing about this time of the year? Rude people

23. Favorite ornament, theme, or color? I ALL of my ornaments and I love that Caroline and Emma are making so many to add to the tree. My favorite colors are red, white, and lime green. If I could have a themed tree (one of these days I will) it will be a glittery fish theme and I will have another peacock themed tree.

24. Favorite for Christmas Dinner? Dressing is my favorite part of the whole meal

25. What do you want for Christmas this year? I have only asked for two material things this year...
A pair of Frye boots that I've wanted for a while and monogrammed bed sheets

MERRY MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Thursday, December 23, 2010

I just threw up in my mouth a little bit


I saw this the other day in Micheals.

Tom and Sally’s Handmade Chocolates. Reindeer Pies. Belgian Milk Chocolate with Almonds.

Upon closer inspection, I see this...


"Pure chocolate. No Doo-doo."

Seriously? I mean, seriously???

Be serious! It is Jesus's birthday, people. We don't eat or talk about poop on Jesus's birthday.

Let's have a little respect.

Completely ridiculous!

Reason 8,362 why I hate Michaels.

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Sick kid.

This was my child all jacked up on valium... no front teeth... with croup. All of these things happened exactly one week ago today.

You can hear the stridors. Sounds like she is gasping for air a little bit.

She woke up Wednesday morning sounding like this.

Yuck!

I took her to the doctor. The PA gave her a steriod by mouth. I requested no shot since the poor child had had her teeth pulled a few hours before.

The steriod got rid of the seal bark and stridors.

Yayyy!



Sorry this is sideways. I don't have the software to turn it and I don't think I can do it on YouTube. What to the ev.

Monday, December 20, 2010

Reason for therapy number 5,653

Many of you asked about Bug's black tooth.

"I've never noticed it."

So, without further ado my friends... the black tooth before the extraction...


Go ahead... click on it... blow it up... get a good look at it.

She is totally going to kick my ass for this one of these days.

PS- Bug, your DAD took this picture. Not me. I'm just sharing it with the world. HE is the reason you will need therapy... not me.

Photo overload.

Just a glimpse of what I've been up to for the past three months.

A few of my favorites...












Thursday, December 16, 2010

LOOK LOOK LOOK

For the first time in four whole years...


YES!

One of the top 10 proudest moments of my life as a parent.

Oh, the little things that make us smile.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Check Please!


Just a cute picture of Bug helping me with my lighting at a photo shoot.


Today's to do list

Tooth extraction x 2 for toddler... check.

Fight with toddler all jacked up on valium... check.

Smash finger in door and almost vomit... check, check.

Make 8 million sausage balls for the first time ever... check.

Burn 8 million calories making said sausage balls... check.

Teacher gifts... check.

Christmas dress x 2... check.

Ready for Christmas parties and program tomorrow... check.

One overtired mama... check.

Peace.

The BS Christmas Guide.

Things I love that will make fabulous Christmas gifts for those that you love...

*NOTE: This is NOT my Christmas list. Keep in mind I am asking for a few of these things though. Ha! These are just things that I love that I wanted to share. You're welcome.

------------------------------


Kitchen gadgets

I love kitchen gadgets. I mean like really LOVE anything and everything for the kitchen. If we ever build a house, my kitchen will be the most awesome room (aside from my closet).

1. Pampered Chef Stoneware Fluted Pan
My MIL bought me this pan and I love it. It doesn't hurt that it makes a cake in the microwave in 10 minutes. Yes, you heard me. Microwave... cake... chocolate lava... 10 minutes.


2. Pampered Chef Mix n' Chop
This little gadget does a fantastic job with ground meats. A plus, it chops the meat up so great that it cooks much faster than when you use a fork, wooden spoon, etc. It is fabulous and I love it.


3. Handmade Oven Hand Mitt
When I learn to sew, this will be one of the first things I make. So cute!


4. Funky Forks and Spoons
I picked out fabulous flatware a few years ago that I absolutely LOVE. These are so cool for dinner parties though. So fun!


5. A fabulous print from Yellow Mug
A print for the kitchen. Simple and classic. Perfection.


6. Hooks for the kitchen
How cool would these look in a kitchen or just anywhere in your house? Fabulous, I know.



7. Pig Platter
You can never have too many serving dishes. This one is so cute and fun!



For the photgrapher in your life

1. Kelly Moore JuJu Bag
How cool is this bag? It looks like a fabulous pocketbook. My name is written all over it. I'm sure yours is too.



For the wine lovers
1. Antique Riddling Rack
A little bit of awesomeness to hang on your wall. This would definitely be a piece that everyone talks about in your home.


2. Monogrammed Stemless Wine Glasses
Elegant, classy, and I need a set. Monogram... rLh. Love it!


3. The Bottle Of Wine Glass
What kind of list would this be without this baby?



Gifts with no category

1. Monogrammed Sheets
I cannot even begin to tell you how much of a sheet snob I am. My house may be messy but my bed is always made with fabulous, clean sheets. I love sheets!


2. Personalized Stationary
Ashley Brooke Designs is AMAZING! She does a custom illustration for a special touch to your stationary. She has even designed for celebs!

Monday, December 13, 2010

The sweetest gift.

We went to Disney on Ice Friday morning.

It was an amazing show.

My driving skills in Raleigh were not so amazing but that is a different story. I like to drive in circles... that's my story and I'm sticking to it. :-)

I FINALLY got home Friday afternoon and there was a package waiting for me. My personal UPS man (aka husband) delivered a fabulous package.

This...


I looked at it. I looked at him.

I said, "You DO read my blog. I can't believe it. Did you order this for me?"

He looked at me like I was nuts. "No," he said.

I ripped open the box a little more to find the invoice.

It took me a minute to find the sender's name.

Then I saw it. The sweetest note ever.


In case you can't see it, it says "Just wanted to send you a Christmas present, but please consider this a token of appreciation for writing a fabulous blog. Hope you're family has a great Christmas! Melissa Beddard Eakes"

Yes, I may have shed a little tear. A tear of happiness of course.

Melissa and I went to ECU together. I was living with my parents at the time and still thought I was going to be a nurse one day. This was before the days of marriage and babies and all the stuff that comes with that. I had a few classes with Melissa and we really hit it off. She is an amazing person. She is genuinely sweet and it is hard not to be friends with her.

We recently reconnected on Facebook and she obviously reads my blog.

Anyway, it was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me. It is an amazing gift of kindness. She said she was paying it forward for all the nice things people have done for her lately.

She will never know how grateful I am. Each time I use my awesome cookbook, I will think of her and the way she made my whole Christmas. If I don't receive anything else this year, my Christmas is complete.

Thank you so much again Melissa. You rock my socks, girl!

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Jack.

Our elf is Jack.

He serves no purpose. He works for like a day and then he is just an ugly little Christmas decoration among all of my cute Christmas stuff.

Whatever.

Anyway, the other morning we got up and Jack hadn't moved.

Fabulous.

The children noticed. I was all, "Caroline, you went to bed too late last night. Jack didn't have time to fly back to the North Pole so he just stayed in that old spot."

She agreed and we went about our morning.

Ryan comes home.

"Umm. Jack didn't move AND he is flopped over." He goes to fix him to sit straight and the girls scream... "NO!! YOU CAN'T TOUCH HIM!!"

The girls began to explain why he hadn't moved.

"Yeah, but he looks like there is something wrong," he said. In all seriousness, he looked at the girls and said, "Maybe he's dead. He looks dead. Maybe THAT'S why he didn't fly back."

Way to work together as a team, Ryan. Thank you. It's ok to help a sista out every once in a while... ass.

Also, don't fuss when your children will need therapy in a few years and it will all go back to the day you told them there Elf may be dead.

Thanks for making me look like mother of the year.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Tick off Tuesday and Randoms all rolled into one.

- Rude people tick me off

- The public in general pisses me off

- Fruitcake (is that one word or two? whatever. I don't care) it ticks me off.

- I hate the fact that during the Christmas season you will encounter the rudest people you have all year.

- I hate insurance and dealing with insurance companies.

- I dislike pumping gas. I am always scared my car is going to explode.

- I get very angry that I can NEVER find scissors when I need them.

- It ticks me off when you work really hard for something and are let down by your group of friends. Thank goodness for other friends that take their spot.

- Biggest tick off of today... we took the girls to get their teeth cleaned today. We decided to use a pediatric dentist because we knew that Emma's black tooth would need special treatment. We just didn't realize how special the treatment would be. After cleaning her teeth and doing xrays, the Dr. told us that Emma's black front tooth is abscessed. What's even better? The other front tooth right beside it is abscessed too. Fabulous. The Dr. warned us that with a fall, more than likely more than one tooth would be damaged. Guess what? It just so happened to be BOTH of Bug's FRONT teeth. Ugh! She is having them pulled next Wednesday. I am so nervous about it I could throw up. Keep us in your prayers. Poor thing will probably miss her Christmas program which is next Thursday. :-(

- It ticks me off that I have no wine glasses. Yep. You heard me. I have NO wine glasses. I have plastic wine cups from Pier One. Classy, I know.

- Now for randoms... Do y'all have any cute ideas for teacher gifts? I think I am just going to do gift cards but you know me. I'm always looking for something cute and over the top.

- SANTA'S COMING!!!!

- Jack the Elf is making his rounds. Santa sent Caroline and Bug a message via Portable North Pole. It's CHRISTMAS!

- I have a long list. One thing on it though is Ree Drummond's cookbook, The Pioneer Woman Cooks: Recipes from an Accidental Country Girl. If you don't read Ree's blog, you are missing out. I puffy heart her!

- I dislike eggnog but those eggnog candles smell fabulous!

- Our Christmas tree is just perfect this year. Pictures to come.

- I am off to finish midnight edits then it's to bed I will go.

Monday, December 6, 2010

Send my hubs a message please.

Can someone please tell my husband that I want this for Christmas...


who I will affectionately name Bouvier, Genevieve or Eliza.

OR




Thanks.

PS- I only threw the dog in there to "pretend" to give him choices. I know he will totally choose a camera over a dog. I also know that I will not be getting either item. One can hope and dream, right?

How Shutterfly Just Might Save my Christmas

Click over my my review/giveaway blog to read!

Thursday, December 2, 2010

TO THE MOON!!!!!

My children like to swing "to the moon".

This all started with my Dad who my children affectionately call "Jay".

Yes, that is his first name.

Yes, that is what they call him.

He is totally not a Papa, Grandpa, or any other name. He is a "Jay".

Anyway, Ryan and I took the girls to the park the other day.

Emma asked to swing the baby swings even though she can swing in the big girl swings now.

"Fast, Daddy!"

"Ryan, swing her to the moon," I yelled as I snapped pictures.

This is what happened...


"Dear sweet baby Jesus! Not that high!!"

I almost lost it.

Emma almost flipped out but loved it.

Ryan was oblivious as to why I almost had a heart attack.

And one more time for good measure...


Nutjobs.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Sisters


This princess was sick Monday night.

She started throwing up about 6:30pm and finally stopped about 3:30am Tuesday morning.

It was a long night.

Just after Caroline 1st throwing up spell, I took Bug upstairs to get a bath. I was in the process of bathing her and Big walked in.

"I have to fow up Mama."

I held her hair back as she threw up.

Emma was in the bath tub which is located right beside the toilet.

She watched as Big threw up and I heard her gag.

Then I heard her clapping and she said, "Yayy Big! You did it! Good job, Big! Cool, Big! Cool! Yayyy!"

Hopefully she will be that great of a cheerleader for her sister in their later years when Mama's not there after those wild parties to hold back hair. ;-)

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Smile of the Day.

Dearest Santa,

I know what I ask for is extreme. Case in point... Louboutin Hyper Prive Peep-Toe Pumps in nude, a 2011 Infiniti QX56, implants.

This gift, however, is reasonable.

I saw it today and I have to have it.

I have been pretty good this year. Aside from multiple mommy meltdowns, bad words, and just being mean sometimes... I'd say it's been a pretty good year for me.

So without further ado, my Christmas gift...


Meet The Bottle of Wine Glass.

Yes, Santa, you read that correctly. This glass holds a WHOLE bottle of wine.

The description is my favorite.

"The Bottle of Wine Glass is located somewhere on the "classy" continuum between "a passed out drunk clutching the last sips of his bottle of Nightrain" and drinking straight from the bottle. And that's exactly where we like to be."

They made this glass for me. I just know it.

And talk about convenience. No more multiple trips to the refrigerator. Yayyy!

Perfect Christmas= Me, this bottle wine glass, & a bottle of Christmas Eve

Of course, I will still want the Louboutins, car, and other items I've requested.

Feliz Navidad!!

Not all it's cracked up to be.

I finally did it.

After two years of waiting, I finally ate at Chipotle.

I promised to blog about my first Chipotle experience. So, here it is.

As many of you know, MckMama eats here often. After reading about her food and looking at the amazing pictures, I have been dying to go.

Every time we go to Raleigh, we always end up eating somewhere else.

This weekend, my sister and I went to the Pinocchio ballet preformed by the Carolina Ballet. The ballet was nothing short of amazing and I can't wait to see another show by the Carolina Ballet. They are amazing dancers.

Anyway, afterwards we decided to shop a little and eat lunch. I thought about Chipotle and all but insisted we eat there. Ha!

I walked in with high hopes.

First bummer... the menu is small.

I had a burrito with chicken, cilantro rice, tomatillo green chili salsa, cheese, sour cream and black beans.

We also shared a bag of chips, salsa, and guacamole.

I must admit that the guacamole was the best of all. It was wonderful.

The burrito was dry and a little bland.

So after two years... I can now say that Bonfire's is so much better.

Chipotle... it's not all that it's cracked up to be. Bummer.

Monday, November 29, 2010

Monday Randoms

1. I'm back.

2. Brandon's wedding is over. Thanksgiving is done. Maybe after Christmas I will get back into blogging every single day. Until then, you will have to deal with BS in spells.

3. Thanksgiving was delicious! Nana did a fabulous job. I ate and ate and ate and ate more. It was ridiculous.

4. I got the girls Christmas tree up. It is my favorite tree. I love it! White tree, color lights, lots of glitter, lots of pink, purple, blue, and silver. It is perfect!

5. I decided to put a Christmas tree in my bedroom this year. I LOVE Christmas trees. We had two extra small 6ft fake trees so I decided to put one of them to good use. Ryan came home, walked in our room and was all "Why the hell is there a Christmas tree in my bedroom?" I, of course, ignored him. I know that he secretly enjoys laying in bed watching TV with the Christmas list glistening over in the corner.

6. Speaking of Christmas, I have heard a lot of people post about "Xmas" and how much they dislike it. I went through this last year. I didn't understand where the X in Xmas would come from. I just didn't believe someone would cruelly take Christ's name out of Christmas. So, I did a little research to find out how Xmas even came about. I may have posted this last year. If so, bear with me. I will share it again.
The X in Xmas is actually the Greek letter Chi, which was a common abbreviation of Kristos, Christ's name. Now, I know you are saying "Kristos" does not begin with an X. Yes, you are right. However, Kristos written using the Roman and Greek alphabet start with an X.
Anyway, just a little trivia I thought I would share. Now, whenever I see "Xmas", it doesn't bother me as much. I know most people are just lazy or are trying to make a political statement by writing it that way. However, that X stands for so much more in my eyes. Without Him, there would be no reason for the season.

7. Do you think Santa can bring me a new car?

8. I hate cold weather. Just hate it.

9. We had turkey hash at Thanksgiving dinner. As a child, it was one of my favorite foods. Anyway, Caroline in now in love with turkey hash. She affectionately refers to it as "turkey rash".

10. Jack, our Elf on a Shelf, came to stay with us. He came the day after Thanksgiving. Caroline was good for a day.

11. I wonder if Santa can bring me implants a pair of Louboutins?

12. Speaking of the god of shoes... have you seen his collection of shoes for Barbie? I need them.

13. William Rast is getting ready to release a line at Target. I am pumped. You know they are my favorite jeans EVER! Hopefully there will be a few pairs in the collection.

14. Emma hates the camera. How am I suppose to get a Christmas card picture?

15. I haven't started Christmas shopping yet.

16. I haven't put up my real tree yet.

17. I am super prepared for Christmas.

18. What's on your Christmas list?

19. I am hosting Bunco Thursday night. If you live in our area and are up for playing, comment or message me. You don't need to know how to play. We will teach you. We need 2 more subs. We can play with ghosts but it is better with people. I promise it will be a good time.

20. I am off to bed. It was a long weekend. Yayy for preschool tomorrow!!

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Grey's Super Party.

Check it.<--------------- Yes, click the link.

My nephew's cute party.

Crafts by Bird.

Photos by Hailey.

I'm been meaning to post and keep forgetting

I am setting a schedule now for blogging. I have gotten so behind and I hate it. It is driving me nuts.

Keep calling, emailing, texting, messaging, etc. Stay on top of me about blogging. Thanks.

Friday, November 12, 2010

Gangsta

I was the white girl back in 2003 yelling HOLLERRR instead of HOLLAAAA!

Seriously, I am about as non-gangster as you can get.

However, I went gangsta on my husband yesterday. Not gangster... gangsta.

Here is how the conversation went:

Hailey: "Oh, so we aren't going out to lunch?"

Ryan: "No."

Hailey: "Let's just go. What are we going to eat?"

Ryan: "We have stuff here to eat and you have lots of stuff here that you can do."

Hailey: "Like what?"

Ryan: "Like mop, wash clothes, dust..."

Hailey: "No, you need to get yo ass up off da couch and mop, wash clothes, etc. (clearly mocking him)."

Ryan: "(Clearly mocking me)Get YO ass up off DA couch? Really? REALLY?"

I felt gangsta. Therefore, I have been listening to country music all day so that I will start using words like ain't & y'all.

Country music= crisis averted.

I did, however, look up my gangsta name on this website known as Gangsta Name Generator. This is what my gangsta name is...


Bless my sweet little heart, y'all! I don't think that gangsta is for me.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

ATTACK

There is no other way to begin this post... I was attacked by a chicken.

Go ahead. Laugh.

If it was you, you would NOT be laughing. In all honesty, I can laugh now but at the time of the attack... I was screaming like a baby. Seriously. Imagine that... me screaming, saying cuss words, and doing karate moves.

Let me set the scene for you.

I rode over to my BFF's house. She has a pond and a little green shed. Perfect backdrops for the pictures I was taking.

Caroline fell asleep on the way so when we got there I told Emma to sit tight and I would be right back. I hopped out of the car to survey the little green shed.

That's when I saw it. Chickenzilla. This is the monster of chickens. I'm talking if I killed it, we could throw it on the grill and feed a small army.

Anyway, the chicken was obviously not happy that I was there. It began to run towards me.

"Don't run Hailey. DO NOT RUN!" I thought to myself. "The chicken will chase you and it will be all over then."

I politely asked the chicken if I could go back to my car. No such luck. Reasoning with a chicken is like reasoning with a 2 year old... it doesn't happen.

"WTF am I going to do? I have got to get back to my car before Bug starts freaking out."

5 minutes pass. The chicken is making that loud chicken noise and spreading its wings.

I said lots of cuss words and slowly turned to walk away. The chicken followed... as did more cuss words.

I finally made it to Arrin's moms house in hopes to find her brother (they are his stupid chickens anyway). Nope. He wasn't home.

I tried to get the dog to follow me and protect me. Nope. The dog was smarter than that. He knew that the stupid chicken would attack him instead. So, I grabbed a random shoe that was on the porch as my backup.

Now, it was just me and my weapon (a shoe) against a monster chicken.

I slowly began to make my way back to my car. I made a big circle around the backyard. The chicken followed my every move... spreading his wings and neck feathers and such all along the way. Stupid chicken.

He cornered me next to a small tree. He spread his wings and began flying towards me.

What was I suppose to do?

I kicked it. I kicked the chicken. It was more of me just putting my boot out and the chicken flying into it rather than an actual kick. (Yes, PETA people. I semi-harmed a chicken. If you don't understand, you must have never been attacked by a monster chicken. Come to La Grange. I'll show you one.)

After the "kick", I threw the shoe at it and ran. I ran as fast as my little legs and sweet cowboy boots would take me.

I made it to my car in one piece. As I sat there breathless with the sound of an angry chicken in the background, I said a little prayer thanking God for letting me get away. I also think it is pretty sweet that I have broken in my cowboy boots a little more because a chicken flew into them.

I drove away from the scene with an extreme fear of chickens but a sweet pair of roughed up cowboy boots. I'll call that even.



-------------------


Here is a picture of the chickens. The one closest to my side mirror is the attacker...


I look forward to the day I get to eat you Chickenzilla. My husband has big plans to cook your up nice and crispy just for me. Peace out!

Friday, November 5, 2010

My OCD

Last night, I got into bed and turned the TV on. I can't go to sleep without the TV on. It's my thing. It drives Ryan nuts but whatever. He will eventually get over it and I will eventually get over the way he brushes his teeth.

Anyway, Kathy Griffin's Whore on Crutches was on. Of course I stopped to watch it. Kathy Griffin is hilarious and I love her.

She did a segment about The OCD Project. I have never heard of the show. She was describing this woman who was always scared she had run someone over. It was one of her OCD tendencies.

Do you know what?

That is one of mine.

After Bunco last night, I dropped a friend off at her house. I was coming out of her neighborhood and went over a bump in the road. I had to turn back. Yes, I had to turn my car around and make sure it wasn't a person. Now, knowing that it was just a bump... when I hit it again, I had to turn around once again and drive back through to make sure it wasn't a person.

After the second time, I finally made myself leave the neighborhood.

As crazy as it sounds, I think I am semi OCD.

When I tee-tee I have to wipe the seat afterwards... even when the seat is clean.

I can't shut the door behind me if we are leaving for the weekend. Ryan has finally learned that it is just easier for him to shut the door. If I have to do it, I will stand there and check the door knob and push on the door until I am satisfied. It could be 3 times, it could be 25. Until I am satisfied, I will not leave that door.

I have found that most of my anxiety comes at times when we are leaving the house for more than just a few hours. I will stress for at least an hour during the ride about the stove, dryer, dishwasher, door, refrigerator door, etc.

I can't just open and close the refrigerator door. If I open it for any reason, when I shut it back I will reopen and shut it until I am satisfied that it is closed.

I think I have typed about these OCD actions and anxiety before. The older I get, the worse it becomes.

I do good to cover it up. Ryan doesn't even notice a lot of the things that I do. Maybe he does and is just so use to it that he lets me do it. Haha!

I don't have an obsession with washing my hands which is weird because a lot of people with OCD do.

I do however have a strange obsession with light switches. If I have to turn a light off, I will stand there with my hand on the switch, pushing down to make sure it is off, until I am satisfied that it is off. I don't do the usual "on and off" game that a lot of people with OCD do. Thank goodness we mostly have lamps in our house. I don't have to use light switches often. Ha!

Am I crazy or are these things normal?

Gosh! I have a kid with a black tooth, a kid who can flatulate on command, a husband who brushes his teeth weird, AND I'm an OCD nutjob! I live the dream life, people. Be jealous. ;-)

Thursday, November 4, 2010

Tooth

My kid has a black tooth.

Ok... it is not BLACK but it is getting there.

It is sort of a grayish color that seems to be getting darker.

If you know Emma, you know that she needs a helmet. I mean seriously... the kid can't walk in a straight line. She walks into things. Falls for no reason. She can trip over air. No kidding. The girl has issues. She is super duper accident prone.

Back to the tooth.

She must have hit it on something.

I think it is dead now.

We have an appointment with a pediatric dentist who I'm sure is going to be terribly expensive.

I'm sure he is just going to tell us that the tooth is dead and there is nothing they can do about it.

***In the meantime, we are letting Bug walk around barefoot, with a rust stained wife beater, a bag of Cheetos, a 2-liter Mountain Dew, and a pack of Marlboro reds tucked in her cleavage. The black tooth just adds so much to the whole picture.

***=This is only a joke. We would never let our children do such things. Please do not be offended by any of the above comments.

WORD TO YA MOTHA

This is post 700!

WORD!

Now, if only I could catch up on photo edits.... I could actually blog again.

I have a list that is a mile long of blog posts.

I will get around to writing them... just don't hold your breath.

Peace out.

Monday, October 25, 2010

ears and bugs don't mix

A few weeks ago... well, October 8th to be exact... I thought I was going to die.

I mean not literally but what happened to me was terrible.

We were getting ready for a party at my mom's house. We were setting up hay bales, tables, fire pits, and all kinds of other fun stuff out in mom's backyard.

I sat down for a minute to talk to Mom and Nana.

That's when it happened. A freaking bug flew in my ear.

I had a massive anxiety attack. It was an awful feeling. I was also freaking out because I watch Untold Stories from the ER. I saw an episode where a june bug flew in a lady's ear. It was terrible.

Anyway, after pouring peroxide in my ear, using the bulb syringe, and blowing in my ear... the stupid bug came out.

It was just a teeny tiny gnat.

I would have sworn that there was a huge bug in there.

It was so loud... like a helicopter.

When it happens, it is almost a claustrophobic feeling. It is almost like you are in a tiny room and can't get out.

You have a bug in your ear, and you can't get it out.

Damn scaphoid ear deformity is to blame. I swear it is. My ear is like a freaking beacon.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

sleep

The past two days have been hellish.

I'm exhausted.

Yes, I am complaining.

Fevers, vomit all over the backseat of my car, babysitting for friends (on top of my two children), taking pictures, editing pictures, somewhat cleaning the house...

it is no wonder that Ryan found us like this...


This picture is just further verification that I need a chin job along with 5 million other "jobs".

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Camera, scissors, pen

I have decided that next time someone says... "Oh! Your camera takes such good pictures."

I'm going to say... "Thanks. Your mouth makes such good compliments."

That is like telling a hair dresser that their scissors cut good hair.

That is like telling a writer that their pen writes great poems.

Anyway... just thought I would vent. ;-)

Here are a few of my latest additions.

The first senior pictures I've done...





6 month olds are my favorite...





18 month olds are pretty darn cute too...