Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Tick Off Tuesday


Big thanks to Carrie for starting this Tuesday fun day.
-------------------------------
Open letters to those that have ticked me off this week...


Dear Husband,
I can do a lot of things. I can do the cheap paper plates. I can do the cheap tampons. I can do the cheap paper towels. I can not, repeat can NOT, do the cheap toilet paper. If you ever come home with 1-ply toilet paper that feels like sandpaper EVER again, I don't even know what is going to happen. You just better hope that I have taken a Xanax that day because if not, the repercussions may be irreversible. 1-ply toilet paper is not even sanitary. Never again will I depend on you to buy toilet paper. Never.again.

Love,
Your wife who has been using the little box of expensive flushable wipes
-------------------------------


Dear Jake,
I am not even going to waste a lot of time on you. Just know that you are an idiot who is now engaged to a mullet wearing, crossed eyed dumb ass if I've ever seen one. Because of you, I will never watch the Bachelor again.

Sincerely,
Very disappointed fan

PS- You really suck.
-------------------------------

I know there are more. I am too tired to think. Enjoy those. More to come later in the week.

Must shower.

Must sleep.

4 comments:

The Nicholsons said...

You are too funny.

Kandid Kelli said...

Funniest thing ever! Jake made a HIGE mistake... My mom and I called Vienna... sausage. She is from a towm 10 mins from where I grew up... I am so ashamed! Classless.

Dana said...

You are so craze!! You and Jeff need to hang out...you know how tight he is, but for as long as I have known him homeboy has bought expensive TP!! When we go on a trip he takes his own roll!!! Haha, glad to know there are others!

Krystyn said...

Don't kill me, but to save $$ we've been buying the "nice" one-ply. It's really not bad.

And, I didn't watch the Bachelor, either. Don't hate.