Happy Birthday Emma.

Dear Emma,

Today, you turn one. 12 months old. Where has the time gone?

Words cannot describe the joy you bring to our lives.

You are the sweetest baby I know. You love giving kisses {even though you bite sometimes} and you snuggle up on my chest so sweet.

Night-night time is our time. As you hold your bottle and close your eyes, I rick-rock you into sweet dreams. I hum a song and off you go. You love sleep. That amazes me. Your sister... she HATES it. You nap everyday. You are on a sleep schedule. Again, this is amazing.

From the beginning, you have been a strong-willed fighter. You are determined to get what you want. You don't even rely on me or Daddy to do it for you. A big soul in a little body.

We call you Bug or Buggy. I don't really remember why. One day, when you were tiny, I said that you kind of looked like a bug. It stuck. Bug stuck. I love it. It fits you so well. You are our little Bug-a-boo. Sweet Buggy.

You are slowly learning to walk. So far, the most steps you have taken has been 5. We are so proud. You will be running all over the house in no time. You have also learned to climb one step. You will climb up on the step and sit there until you are ready to get down. Then, you will scream for me or Daddy and we will come save you. So cute.

You love Caroline so much. You want to do everything that she does. Sometimes, Caroline will slow down for a few minutes to play with you. Those are super sweet moments. You will play tea party together or do puzzles. You act like you are 3 just like her. There are fights between you two sometimes. There was your birthday party, for instance, where you pushed Caroline away from your cake. You decided you didn't want to share. Then there was the time you decided to bite Caroline because she wouldn't leave you alone. You are sisters though and you love each other. You are going to be best friends and I can't wait.

Happy Birthday Bug. You are my baby. Slow down. Don't get big too fast. Take your time, snuggle always and always call on Mama and Dada before you take a big step.

I love you always and forever,
Mommy

*Don't forget to turn up your volume!

Emma's 1st Year from Hailey Lafone on Vimeo.

Letter to Emma- Month Three.

Eyes so blue,

Smile so bright,

You laughed out loud

For the first time Saturday night.


Three months old,

Six weeks you are suppose to be,

You smile whenever Mommy or Daddy speak,

You make having an infant easy.


That's you eating cereal,

You loved it so much,

You ate out of a spoon,

However Dr. P says no spoon can you touch.


Mommy has never listened

to what the doctors say,

I feed you what I want

You like it that way.


You sleep really well,

You're a happy baby.

You might be a little scared of Caroline,

Just maybe.


So little yet getting so big,

Kiss and hug,

Hold and love,

You are our sweet little Emma Bug.

Letter to Emma- Month 2

~*This is late. I wrote it on the 26th but didn't have time to proof read it and post it until today!*~


Dear sweet Em,

Two months. You were born two months ago. You took that first sweet, precious breath two months ago. Can you believe it? What did we do without you? What did we do when it was just Mommy, Daddy and Caroline? I ask myself that everyday. I did the same thing when your sister was born.

With your first child you are so sleep deprived you cannot function. You don't know what you are going to do when you have another little baby. You don't think that you will be able to function. You don't think you will be able to live through the newborn stage again. You have proved me wrong my sweet angel. You are a wonderful baby. You love to lay on your tummy, sit in your chair, or lay in my lap and sleep. You are sleeping for 5-6 hours during the night which still amazes me. My fingers are still crossed that Caroline will sleep soundly for 5-6 hours a night. *Fingers crossed*

During the day, our house is chaos. At times I catch myself staring at you sleeping wondering what you are thinking. I wonder if you are saying to yourself, "Man... if she yells at that thing they call a Caroline one more time... I'm going to poop or pee all over her." Yes, you have done both twice in the past two days.

Nights are our thing. Every night I take you upstairs and swaddle you. I lay you down in your bassinet but it's never right the first time. You always squirm. I pick you up and swaddle you again, kiss your little head, and lay you down. You do a little sigh and you are off to sleep. When you wake up for a feed is my favorite. The whole house is quiet. It is just me and you... in that moment. The soft hum of the fan, the sweet sound of you drinking your bottle, your skin against mine... it couldn't be more perfect. I'll change your diaper and look at your big blue eyes. I kiss you and tell you I love you and lay you back down. You look up at me with those eyes. Those eyes. It is almost as if you understand and hang on to every word I say. I kiss you one more time and you go to sleep. Our nights are perfect. Absolutely perfect.

Your corrected age is one week yet I've been able to hold you in my arms for 2 whole months. What a wonderful 2 months it has been. I am so looking forward to all the things that are to come. Stay sweet and know that I love you forever.

Love always,
Mommy

Letter to Emma- Month 1

Sweet Em,

I can't believe it has been a month since you were born. It was one of the scariest times of my life. We made it though. We are tough girls that fight. What a fighter you are.

I left the hospital on the 29th of October. I had to leave you. My heart ached for weeks. I wanted you at home with me. I visited you daily and would sit with you for hours. Each night before I went to sleep, I would call your night nurse and get an update. I kept a diary for you to read. A diary of how much you weighed, how much you gained, and little fun facts about things that you did that day.

These past few weeks have been difficult. Everyone was use to the upbeat Hailey. The funny Hailey. The Hailey that doesn't let things bother her. The Hailey that has her stuff together. Well, they met the Hailey that cried on numerous occasions because you weren't at home with me. They met the sleep deprived Hailey that woke up every two hours because her body was saying feed Baby Emma but you weren't at home with us yet. They met the tired Hailey that was still trying to be a good Mommy to Caroline but still be with you too. The Hailey that was ready for things to be back to normal... whatever normal may be. At times I felt as if I had the world on my shoulders and wasn't strong enough to hold it up. But I made it. The Beatles once wrote a song that said "I get by with a little help from my friends." Thank goodness for our family and friends that kept me grounded and let me know that everything was going to be alright.

I may be strong but we all have breaking points. We all have those moments in life that we feel like we can't handle. In the beginning, there were days that I rarely smiled or laughed. Every day that passed, it took my breath away a little less when I would have to leave you. If I could make it outside without the lump in my throat rising until tears fall I was doing good.

Am I thankful? Extremely. Thankful for you and your beautiful sister. Two beautiful girls. What more could a Mom ask for? Thankful for our family and friends. Thankful for a healthy baby girl.

Like I said before you are a fighter. You were 32 weeks old and you were breathing on your own less than 2 hours after you were born. You were on CPAP for a short time right after you were born. I am amazed by your strength.

There is always good, there is sometimes bad, and most of the time it is chaotic around here. My world has been all three this month. Things are getting better now. Things are slowly getting back to normal (again, whatever normal may be). No matter what... whether it's good, bad or chaotic... I wouldn't trade being a mommy for the world.

Happy One Month Em-Em. Welcome home.

Love Always and Forever,


PS- You came home on October 26th. Exactly one month after you were born. :-)
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I can do everything through Him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13