All you need to do is cry...

... and you can get whatever you want.

Cowboys boots.


I cried for these bad boys 5 years ago... in the middle of a country western store. Yes, I was grown. Yes, I cried... on the floor... like a child.

Ryan bought them for me for my birthday that year.

Score!

Sunday, Ryan took me to Jame's. It is a little boutique at the beach that I have been wanting to check out.

As I was browsing, I saw lots of things that I needed wanted.

Then I saw them. The Rock & Republic jeans that I have been needing wanting for so long. (Side note: Jeans are my thing. Earl, Seven, William Rast. Be still my heart.)

Hummm. What am I going to have to do to get these? Cry? Scream? Lay in the floor and sob like a baby? My options were not limited to but included all of these choices.

$230. Two-hundred and thirty dollars. TWO-HUNDRED AND THIRTY DOLLARS!

I had a speech planned out in my head. "Ryan, these are an investment. OHmommy makes investments all of the time. These jeans will last me for a little while forever. She invests in Louboutins and Louis'. Me, I'm just investing in jeans for now. It could be much worse. I could want..." (You like how I name drop like I am IRL friends with OHmommy? I WISH!)

Halfway through my speech that I was having in my head, I saw it.

75% off. SEVENTY-FIVE PERCENT OFF! Yes, you heard read me correctly.

Jackpot!

I called Ryan over. "Look babe! My jeans! Guess what? They are 75% off!"

I saw him calculating in his head.

He grabbed three different styles and threw them at me.

I was in Heaven!

I decided on these (with the help of my sister, her best friend, and Ry).


Yes, I included the price tag.

What a receipt? You would like to see it?


$61.11! Yayyyy me!!

Ryan's favorite part? Looking at his total savings...


In conclusion, I learned a lot from this situation. I must cry OR find a sale to get whatever I want. {grin}

Our weekend in pictures.

We went to the beach again this weekend.

Of course, I was behind the camera and Emma was behind it with me for the most part. There are no pictures of us from the weekend. Oh well! I know you are super disappointed that you don't get to see me. Ha!

As I sat here uploading pictures, I realized that this is my Mom and Dad's début on my blog! Welcome Mom and Dad!


Caroline went fishing for the first time this weekend.




Yes, she knows how to reel her own fishing pole. My Dad was so proud!



Here is a crab that they caught. Caroline was not very fond of this animal.


Here is the "big fish" that Caroline caught. What? You don't see him. Hold on, please. I will circle him for you!


There you go. Much better, huh? He was HUGE! {grin}

Caroline and Dad (who she calls Jay) spent the rest of the day naming shells and jumping waves.



She only had one meltdown. I don't even remember what it was about. I couldn't resist taking her picture though.


Ryan helped her swim.


Sunday we had lunch at a wonderful deli on the causeway and Ry took me shopping. Don't worry! There is a post coming soon about what I scored on my shopping trip!

And now for the moment you all have been waiting for...

Without further ado, here is the undistorted picture.

All of your guesses were fantasic.

Did you read Midwest Mommy's comment?


How funny was that! Haha!

And Krystyn's was hilarious. I am so glad she was not right though. I hate Caroline fits. They are NO fun!


No one guessed correctly. It was a little hard. Hopefully you had fun guessing though!

Here you go.

Before:


After:


Yes. That is the trunk of my car. Really, the back of the jeep. The rear area that is used for storing all of my shit stuff. Go ahead. You can click the picture to make it bigger. Totes of clothes that need to be sorted and taken to OUAC, stroller, moldy sippy cup, clothes, towels, floats. You name it. I've got it in there I'm sure.

Don't be jealous. You just wish your car looked this neat.

In need of organizational skills? Call me! I can totally point you in the right direction.

PS- Yes, that is a boob job fund piggy bank. Yes, I do collect change in it. However, sometimes I need change so I will steal from it.

Take a guess.

What do you think this is?

Take a guess. Any guess.

Guess away my friends.

When I tell you the answer, you will probably never be my friend again and talk about me behind my back. That will be ok, though.

Just guess!

Caroline Ryan Conversations

I'm upstairs and I hear Ryan having a very loud phone conversation downstairs. It went a little something like this...

"AYE!"

"NO!"

"SI!"

All this was said in a really weird accent.

Then he said it. He said, "Look, I speak AMERICAN!"

Reaaly, Ryan? You speak American? Last time I checked American is our nationality not our language. English would be our language.
-------------------------------

Overheard leaving a restaurant.

"Ryan, maybe Hailey should drive." No, we was not intoxicated. He made some silly comment that made him sound intoxicated.

Ryan replied, "I could still drive better than her after drinking TWELVE beers."

Thanks a lot, Ryan. Thanks a lot.

I understand that I have hit the pole beside the gas tank at the gas station (I wasn't even getting gas... I was just driving through) and the stop sign in the middle of the intersection with your vehicular device. However, can't you let that go? Can't you just move on? You really need to drop it.
-------------------------------

A few weeks ago...

"Dammit. I have just realized that my analytics and counter html disappeared. Let me go see how long it has been like this."

"About a month," Ryan chimed in.

"I thought you didn't read my "stupid blog"." Picture me doing the air quotations here.

"I don't!"

CAUGHT!

Why have you kept this secret?

Dear BIL and SIL (brother-in-law and sister-in-law),

Yes, you know who you are... KEVIN AND ASHLYN!

Why have you kept this secret from me?

You know I have an addiction to twitter. Well, my twitter friends have informed me of this awesome place to eat. This awesome place being CHIPOTLE. Of course, we do not have one in eastern NC. You probably know this. If BBQ and collards aren't involved, we probably don't have one.

Have you eaten there? If so, you know my love of Mexican food is a little overwhelming so why have you never told me of this place?

We have a little place called Bonfire's and Moe's but I hear that this Chipotle is wayyyy better.

After a little research, I found out that there is a Chipotle approximately 29.72 miles from your house. Our estimated driving time is about 37 minutes.

Be ready. We are coming to visit soon. The best part, I've already made arrangements for lunch or dinner one day.

Love always,
Your favorite SIL in the whole world

PS- Let's not keep secrets anymore, ok?! Love you!

PPS- I am going to forewarn you. I am totally going to bring my camera to document my first experience at Chipotle. I want to share it with my twitter friends.

Convulsions and the Chinese lady.

If you follow me on twitter, you know that we were out and about yesterday. Yes. We went to Once Upon a Child to take some clothes. I decided to go alone. Alone with my two children that is. Imagine... two crazy nutballs that I call children, two BIG boxes of clothes, one single stroller, and just me... one mama. Never again. Never.again.

Anyway, after dropping off the clothes we decided to stay in town and make a day of it. We went to a new salt water fish place. We saw real seahorses and Caroline was so excited. She even got a tattoo to add to her collection. Her collection being... the tat of George Washington on her face. That's how my kid rolls. George. "What's that on your face?" strangers will ask. "George Washington", Caroline will reply.

Anyway, back to the story. After shopping, a playdate at Target and two Sonic stops we were ready to go home. (I felt like MckMama doing a Target playdate and Kelly with all my Sonic in one day.)

We were all exhausted and a little delusional.

Then it happened.

Boom Boom Pow came on the radio.



Go ahead. Press play. Fast forward to 1 minute and 59 seconds. This is the part. This is where we all breakdown.

We were pulling into our driveway when this part came on. We did our normal dance. When it was over, I felt someone watching me.

It was our neighbor, the Chinese lady.

I think she thought I was having convulsions.

I had to get out of my car and explain what the heck was going on. She just laughed and stood there. I don't think she understands English well. She still looked concerned.

Come to think of it, maybe she was just concerned for her safety. Who knows?

I should have just said, "This is how we do it in America, lady!" while doing random dance moves.

How do I always manage to embarrass myself? I have decided that it is for the enjoyment of my readers.

You're welcome.

Mama's got a brand new bag sippy cup.

Shari over at A Psych Mommy had a fabulous giveaway that I entered. The prize? 3 of The Safe Sippy cups. I hoped I would win. Guess what? I did!


I don't know who was more excited... me or Caroline? The pink was her FAVORITE! (NOTE: Please excuse the outfit. She is a dressy bessy that changes clothes at least 6 times a day. This morning she put her blue polka dot dress on. Whatev!)

As soon as the UPS man delivered them this morning, we opened them and Caroline wanted orange Kool-Aid in hers to match her cup.

These cups are AMAZING! What is so amazing about them? Look at this list...

The new 2-in-1 Safe Sippy2 cup is the first sippy cup to combine all of the features parents want most:
- a no-spill valve
- clean 11 oz. non-leaching stainless steel vessel
- all plastics tested free of BPA and phthalates
- removable handles
- dishwasher safe
- an insulating easy grip outer sleeve
and my favorite feature of all
- a straw adaptor that instantly converts your sippy cup to a straw bottle in seconds.

This AMAZING cup also comes with
- a travel cap for keeping the spout clean
- a travel plug to prevent fluid from dripping into your bag
- a straw converter.

So, like I said... I won 3 sippy cups in pink, blue, and green. They also sent 4 spare valves and 4 O-ring gaskets.

This was an amazing prize!!

You should try The Safe Sippy! Caroline sure loves hers.

Not Me! Monday

Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.


We did not go to the beach this weekend to celebrate the 4th of July.






We did not have fun.


We did not get down on Friday, eat pizza for dinner, swing in the hammock, and walk on the beach.





Caroline did not jump in the water with her clothes on. She was not extremely upset about her clothes being wet. She did not throw a fit and take her clothes off. We would never let her walk home in just her panties. Especially since we did not have to walk home through a neighborhood. Ha!






We did not spend Saturday on the beach. I did not forget my camera.

Caroline did not do wonderful out there. She did not play by herself and keep herself content for hours. She did not throw sand in Carey's face and then laugh about it.

We did not go back inside for lunch and then rode the jet ski.

Ryan did not take me out to dinner Saturday night. We did not go to one of our favorite places in the whole world, Amos Mosquito's. It was not delicious. We did not have fried pickles for our appetizer. I did not have shrimp & grits as my entree. Ry did not have the catch of the day, which happened to be one of his favorites... yellowfin tuna. His entree was not completed with jasmine rice and fresh succatash. YUM! I We did not order Godiva chocolate creme brulee for dessert. I did not only let Ryan have ONE spoonful.

I was not worried about Caroline being scared of the fireworks. She did not love them. Emma did not sleep through the whole fireworks display. Do not worry! I did not take pictures of her before she fell asleep!




I did not use this Not Me! Monday post as a picture post.

I did not type this while drinking my morning coffee... while Caroline ate orange watermelon (yes, there is such a thing)... and while Emma sat on the floor trying to crawl.

Caroline conversation #187956

C: "Mommy, look. Me shave my legs."

Me: "You WHAT? Come here! Let me see!"

I bend down to rub her legs. Smoother than a baby's bottom but they always have been. Did she really shave? We will never know.

After rubbing her legs, I have some sort of white powder substance on my hands.

Me: "What is this?"

C: "Huh?"

Me: "This white stuff. What is it?"

C: "It Daddy armpit soap."

She totally meant deodorant.

Yes, she had deodorant all over her legs. At least she smelled fresh (like Daddy's armpit soap).

PS- Yes, I have hidden the razors in a better spot. She will never find them now. Neither will Ryan when he goes to shave tomorrow. He will flip out when he can't find it. He says that I hide his stuff on purpose. Tomorrow, he will be right.

PPS- After close examination of the razors, I don't think she actually used them. Clearly, there was deodorant all over my bathroom though. Keep in mind... this all happen in about a 3 minute period of time.

Wordless Wednesday with words.

Dear Emma,

This is your head. This is your hair. I wanted to write to you and formally apologize.

Notice the double cowlicks on top. They are from me.

Notice the massive cowlick on your neck? That is from Daddy.

We are extremely sorry, Buggie. Hopefully it will work itself out.

We love you,
Mommy and Daddy

PS- You're welcome! We know you will hate thank us for it one day!


PPS- Yes, your hair stands in a perfect mohawk. You would not cooperate for us to get a good picture of it. Have no fear though, I will try again. Yes, you also have stork bite on the back of your neck. We call them angel kisses.